"Close don't count," is a little thing I say when I have been taken care of by an aspect of myself that I am not specifically conscious of.  Like when I suddenly swerve and amazingly avoid an accident *right at the exact moment when that action needed to occur.*  What always grabs my attention is that those are the moments when it occurs to me that I was involved in a scene completely unconsciously.

Uh oh.
I resolve to pay attention.
Like all resolutions, it is solid
until it's not and needs to
once again be reformed.
Those pesky solutions!
Gotta keep an eye on 'em.
Always solving and resolving themselves.

LOL

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"...you are the black sheep of the universe, because you no longer blame gods nor devils nor circumstances for those effects in your life that you do not like; nor bow down to gods, devils, or circumstances in praise for those good conditions that you have yourselves created."
*** & . . .

“There was a god in ancient Egypt, and his name was Seth, and he was disreputable. And he threw aside establishments, and whenever other gods rose up and said, ‘We are the truth, we are pure and we are holy,’ this disreputable god stood up, and with a voice like thunder, said: ‘You are nincompoops!’
“And the other gods did not like him, and whenever they set up their altars, he came like thunder, but playfully, and tossed the altars asunder, and he said, ‘Storms are natural, and good, and a part of the earth, even as placid skies are. Winds are good. Questions are good. Males and females are good. Even gods and demons are good, if you must believe in demons. But, structures are limited!’
“And so this god, who was not a god, called Seth, went about kicking apart the structures, and he gathered about him others who kicked apart the structures. And they were themselves, whether they were male or female. Whether they thought of themselves as good or bad, or summer or winter, or as old or as young, they were creators. They were questioners.
“And whenever another personality set itself up and said, ‘I am the god before you, and my word is law,’ then Seth went about saying, ‘You are a nincompoop,’ and began again to kick apart the structures.
“And so you are yourselves, in your way, all Seths, for you kick apart the structures, and you are the black sheep of the religions and the black sheep of the scientists, and the black sheep of the physicians, and the black sheep of your mothers and your fathers, and your sisters an your brothers.
“And yet, the mothers and the fathers and the sisters and the brothers listen, for they do not have the courage to be the black sheep, and they quail in the voice of the thunder that is so playful, though they do not understand it because they equate loudness with violence, and they think that female is passive, and the male is aggressive; and that war and violence must then erupt from the reality of mankind.
“And so you are, indeed, all black sheep of the universe, and Sethites have always been the black sheep of the universe!
“Now, to be a Sethite, you do not have to follow this Seth, you simply follow the Seth in yourself, and that Seth in yourself is a questioner, and an explorer, and a creator. And the Seth in yourself knows when to passively flow with the wind that blows through the window above a summer town, and when to go against the force of your environment. You were Sethites before you met me, and there was a Seth before I was Seth, and the spirit follows through the ages as you know them.
* * * & . . .

Sometimes, it's just nice to be reminded.

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Fallacy #46: Mind is a clean slate at birth
NEW THOUGHT . . . The mind is well stocked with thoughts, attittudes, and beliefs before it integrates with the physical brain. It holds desires and intents and objectives given it by the inner self as a framework for the life it will come into. This sets the stage for challenges and opportunities ahead. And why the prebirth mind-stocking? Because one purpose of our being in this reality is to learn energy manipulation and physical construction translated into life experiences, and our inner self wishes to point us in a certain direction out of the chute, so to speak, which could help fulfill our intricate individual purposes.
The Book of Fallacies, A Little Primer of New Thought, by Lynda Dahl and Cathleen Kaelyn.
* * * Personal Example: My mind was flooded with fem domme images.  I simply blew them off, knowing/not knowing exactly what they were. The thoughts I processed at the time were primarily of, "Yes, well ... I'm only 7 years old now." I remember laughing about it, in the spirit of, "Good grief!" ... a feeling of inappropriate timeliness, yet from a child's mind.
I was very disturbed when I gained consciousness in the middle of a roleplay when I was 8 and the new neighbor woman was screaming at me that I was a freak. It was the 12yo boy's mother. I knew we were having fun, I felt a powerful happy surge of energy flowing through me and I was very excited. The boy smiled at me beautifully over his shoulder as his mother dragged him home. I walked into the house and laid down for the rest of the day, willing myself to not float away like that again. I was worried about myself but figured that my Guardian Angel must have stepped in and saved me from myself before things got out of hand. At dinner, I told my parents that the woman misunderstood that I was only playing nicely with her son and we were having a good time together but she didn't like that - because, you know, he was 12 and I was only 8. I was told to stay away from her and when she tried to talk to my mother about it, she brushed it off as kids playing together ... just using their imagination.
Which, of course, was exactly what we were doing. But I never let that happen to me again in elementary school and I was never afraid of what stepped out of my shadows in regards to my sexual strength and vitality. It was only my Self. We are stronger, more powerful, more creative, more directive than we realize. Our grace and beauty are beyond words to describe. So we experience them. Shocking as they are. And as Lovely.
Embrace. Reject. Live. Die. The things we think about, know, feel, sense, understand, perceive, observe ... blibbity blah blab ... we must choose and decide. And we can always change our minds.

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Most of the time, I've associated materializations with some sort of physical, tangible, thingy or a synchronization of events that deliver some sort of connection or outcome.

But this time, last night, I did something different.  In fact, I had two materializations emerge on the same evening, back to back with each other, both quite unexpected and both delivering far more than I anticipated.

The first was with my husband wherein he suggested a certain activity.  We had tried this once before, several years previously, and my anxiety at the time was profound.  I felt extremely uncomfortable and was overly sensitive.  It was not a good experience, though I managed to camoflage it well enough that it appeared I was at least amused.  I was very busy putting the squilch on it and I succeeded, admirably.  It was not brought up again and for all practical purposes seemed to be immediately forgotten.  Whew!  And I was safe for a number of years.  Until last night.  When my husband suddenly decided that we would go out for appies and drinks.  And that experience was so unexpected and relaxing and that we suddenly found ourselves on the way back to that place.

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Nature of Personal Reality ... quotes

"You cannot escape your own attitudes, for they will form the nature of what you see. Quite literally you see what you want to see; and you see your own thoughts and emotional attitudes materialized in physical form. If changes are to occur, they must be mental and psychic changes. These will be reflected in your environment. Negative, distrustful, fearful, or degrading attitudes toward anyone work against the self."

So powerfully, amazingly, TRUE.  The evidence is overwhelmingly real.  But don't think this limits you to observing yourself.  I've learnt that this is exceptionally applicable in being with others ... and that changes can, and do, often times happen very quickly in relationships when psychic, mental, emotional changes are undertaken deliberately.

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